I’m a little late to this conversation, but I’ve been obsessed with the concept of Third-Culture Kids since I read the article a few weeks ago. The author published it over 18 months ago (where have I been?!?) – I feel like I’ve been missing out on an important discovery!
(To read the article, you can find it here.)
Technically, I don’t qualify as a TCK: I grew up exclusively in the US, traveled extensively for brief periods of time (couple of weeks at one go) as an adult, and only recently lived overseas (hi, Kiwis!). But the idea that kids are profoundly impacted by being uprooted and shifted and forced to adapt to a new place isn’t applicable exclusively to international moves. The skills you develop as a kid in order to adapt to the continual change, adapt to your new community, adapt to your new way of life overseas are the same skills you develop when you’re moved from New Jersey to Texas to New York to Florida. You may not be learning a new language or counting cash in a new currency, but you are thrust into the deep end of the pool – learning how the social strata work (critically important in those early teen years!), making friends, discovering the “cool” hobbies and activities. Is there less complexity when you stay domestic? Sure, I suppose – but does that discount the experience?
I’ve often talked about moving around a lot as a kid – celebrating my 12th birthday in our 5th house – and as much as I hated it back then, I’m grateful for the skills I learned early in life. I may have cursed the prospect of starting over with friend circles, but now I can find a friendly soul in just about any room. I may have despised setting up my new bedroom and morning routine for school, but now I can unpack an entire house and feel settled in just 2 days. What seemed like the “end of the world” as a child, now feels like a gift I was given to develop real-life, useful skills.
There’s a downside to all of that movement, too (and probably good fodder for a therapist to analyse). But overwhelmingly, I see it as a good thing. I feel most comfortable when I’m on the move, exploring the world, refusing to settle. “Home” isn’t geography for me – rather, it’s where my people are, wherever they are.
Hey fellow move veteran! Are you back in the states? Look me up! Or rather, I will email you!
I moved every 2-4 years as a kid. First move at 6 months. I think we had moved 7 times before I hit 12. I can definitely fit into many groups. Do you feel like you’re successful because of it?